The upper picture was taken in April. The second one I took at the open house last week. That’s framing to Zillow in two months. This ain’t your grandmas accessory dwelling unit. Granny flats will be granny-free in three years. Sooner, perhaps. For this kind of rent money, people will let her sleep on the living room couch.
In its own halting way, Van Nuys is going Sherman Oaks. Sherman Oaks is going West Hollywood, which is going Tokyo.
In a related development, one of my neighbors put new siding on his house.
And the City of Los Angeles chipped up some perfectly good wheelchair ramps and filled them back in again. Because
the money has been appropriated progress.
Ask the city for basic beautification and neighborhood street lighting and you will be told there is no money at all. The City is broke. Broke! The field deputies rattle their chains of poverty the way my mother used to wail over her $100/month land payment. But when it comes to Keynesian ditch-filling stimulus, the bucket of Monopoly money is bottomless.
We want what we want when we want it. Our desires can be fulfilled…up and down the class structure…cheaper, faster. Hyper-efficiency and supply-chain management are the cardinal virtues of our time.
Remember when Wal-Mart was the Death Star of retail? Crusher of towns? Come China, unload your shipping containers of plastic thneeds. We’ll take the whole flotilla. People feared Wal-Mart as much as they once feared Microsoft. They were both just too…dominant, and now not at all.
Now we have Amazon traffic jams on our block in the afternoon, and there is no limit to things we can obtain, overnight. Need an obscure component for your kitchen faucet? If you go to Lowe’s they’ll try to re-sell you a new Kohler for $200. Alternatively, you can order a rubber washer on your phone for $4. Eighteen hours later it’s in your hand. A three-minute crash course at YouTube University and your problem is fixed.
Framed in this way, Amazon looks heroic. But most days, stuff comes not because we need it, rather because its One Click away. Idle clicking is the empty calories of shopping. In our Cambrian explosion of online vending, any niche start-up, any cottage craftsman can find a willing buyer, in theory, somewhere in America. The sheer scale of options eclipses traditional shipping sources ability to keep up with demand. Packages frequently arrive in cars driven by underemployed, modern-day Pony Express riders hustling a buck in a reprise of an earlier Toquevillian America…except for the economy being run (mostly) through one company.
Los Angeles is becoming a city of high-end boutiques at the top end and dollar stores and street vendors at the other, in a classic barbell formation. The narrow middle, which isn’t actually narrow since it includes most of us, is moving online. This is not the way our city is structured geographically, which is to say horizontal, reflecting an earlier egalitarian class structure. There are architectural showcases on Van Nuys Blvd which have sat vacant for years having no desirability as a boutique. Then there are squat freight structures that once served railroad spurs east of downtown you can’t lease for $50 per square foot today.
As recently as the birth of the iPhone, 75% of American porn was made right here in the Valley. Porn was a lucrative business run on a factory basis like the Warner Brothers of old. It was difficult to obtain, meaning pricy, which was reflected in the remuneration to performers. Now it is ubiquitous and cranked out on webcams in apartments all over the world for electronic tips. An economic theorist might posit this as empowerment for women, who can now bypass the middleman. No service contracts. No suitcase pimps. No one denied employment due to lookism, only gratuities. In practice, thousands of cams are aggregated through a single entity, PornHub, the Amazon of adult entertainment.
The Atlantic has an article this week detailing the cheerful efforts of a high school senior from Stockton to start her cam career. Dripping with condescension toward inland California and its people masquerading as concern for her welfare, (the presumption being no working-class life there is worth having) the first paragraph spells it out for us: the largest private employer is an enormous Amazon fulfillment center.
For the moment, she will step into a zero-gravity orbit in which the laws of hyper-efficiency don’t apply, and for a few days, she will be the NewNew Girl, as gaze arresting as her fellow Stocktonian Jeremy Meeks, peeking out from a screen grid of camgirls grinding for tokens in a debauched race to the bottom. She will quickly become a character of out of Dreiser or Hardy, unneeded as the old Van Nuys Savings and Loan.
Our world is flat, and it wants fulfillment.
*Photo credit YouTube